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Sunday, 8 April 2018

Why is this Sunday service taking so
long oh Lord?
My tummy was rumbling so loudly that
I had to sneak a peep at Bro. Paul
sitting close to me to ensure that he
wasn’t listening to the rhythmical
sounds from my inside!
I woke up this morning just like other
days when I felt the sticky thing in-
between my legs.
Oh not again Lord!
I knew from that moment that I was
going to have to battle with
dysmenorrhea menstrual pain for the
rest of the day and I really hated the
I racked my wardrobe for drugs and
gosh! My fervin was exhausted. I
angrily threw the empty sachet away
and had a warm bath, getting set for
the Sunday service.
I had just concluded a three-day fast
and I was looking rather lean- but it
was worth it. It bordered on issues
concerning my life and I had to take it
I didn’t know how to hear God!
Well, most times after praying
fervently, I would just tell God to talk
to someone or reveal something to
someone else if he didn’t want to talk
to me personally and that was what he
had always done.
Probably I was just too filthy!
I had told him that in the service of
today, if he wanted to talk to me, he
should do so through all the
ministrations in the church- the choir
ministration, the drama ministration,
the message itself and all.
I was however shocked when the title
of the song the choir sang was
‘Holiness unto the Lord’!
I knew about holiness so well and that
was not my prayer point at all. I am on
the way to perfection and I am
carefully watching my steps lest I stray.
I didn’t want this choir ministration. So
as they ministered, it was just as if they
were pumping LaCasera drink into my
body system that made the body fluid
escaping my body to gush out as if
being pursued vehemently.

‘Let us jam our hands as our dear
father in the Lord, Pastor Idile takes up
the mic’ He announced in his usually
affecting tone. He was the reason for
my prayer- Tony!
I sighed deeply.
‘God, are you just going to talk to me?
Are you going to speak to me through
this man of God? I really need your
touch oh Lord’ I uttered silently as my
faith got revived again.
‘Touch me one more time oh Lord, yes
dear Lord, touch me one more time oh
Lord, I need the touch of the Father, I
need the touch of the Lord, touch me
one more time oh Lord!’ the pastor
sang in his baritone voice and the
awesomeness of the whole thing
pushed me down to my knees.
I just mentioned His touch right now
and the pastor is singing about His
touch too.
‘The service is definitely for me’ I said
so loudly that I noticed Bro. Paul
looking towards me but I wasn’t
moved. Who says this God isn’t real
and I would love to tell him to
He is good abeg!
The message snowballed and I listened
with rapt attention, slapping my laps
together so the pain in my tummy
would ‘gerrarahere’.
The topic was ‘Confused?’ -So apt,
touching and just like that.
Oh yes I was confused. Madly confused!
I said yes to Jean’s proposal last month
and the relationship had started to
bloom greatly until this Tony came
around that same week. He was a
serving corps member and he was
deployed to my area, so he worshipped
with us at the central church.

Since I set my eyes on him, my mind
had been in a real state of chaos. I was
just so confused that I decide to step
away from the choir group where he
was very vibrant so I could get things
I was going to the church that very day
and as I always did, I was dressed
gorgeously for the service in my
opened toes high-heeled shoes. As I
locked my car, I started walking as if
being pursued.
Just then, Sis. Jane called my name and
as I tried to turn back in order to
answer her call, I never knew a canal
was before me. My shoe nose-dived
into the canal but just like the slow
motion in any Korean movie, a strong
hand-held me and pulled me up with a
“Sorry ma” he said and I looked into
his small, milky face. I blinked
severally, trying to get my voice.
Who is this boy?
He bowed slightly before me and off he
went- but my eyes went with him!
I slapped my head to order that very
day to no avail especially when my
research told me he was just an
ordinary corps member.
‘He is just a small boy’ I thought to
myself but the turmoil in my heart
Whenever I went to the church, I
would take a spot in the choir room
where I would have the opportunity to
get a good look at him without being
noticed by anybody.
Whatever he did appealed to me. There
was a day that I saw him blowing his
nose. The way he held the tissue paper
was skilled! Funny me!Immediately I realized that I wasn’t
getting things straight again, I had to sit
down, fast and pray well so that God
would speak to me. So, he would clear
my head and put the right thing in
‘Most time, we think we have arrived
and that it is time to settle down
because we have the job, beautiful
accommodation, money and all but God
is saying no! And you’ve got to wait on
him’ My pastor killed it. As I jotted the
point down, my body shook violently.
Pastor was stupendously right!

“What else are you waiting for my
daughter? You are well employed as a
lecturer. You have a degree in Mass
Communication and two Masters
Degrees in Public Relations and
Advertising respectively. What are you
waiting for? You are our only daughter
o and see how big you are. No one
would even believe that you are not 25
yet.” My mother complained bitterly
the last time we met.
My aged mother and father had been
my specimen for a good marriage for
many years now. Though it took about
four decades after their marriage
before they had me, the barren years
really strengthened their love.
Though I am very beautiful, I have the
dominant gene of my father. I am built
like a man- with well-built muscles, a
deep, bass voice and very hairy skin. In
my secondary school days, I was called
‘Miss Gorilla’
Although I battled with inferiority
complex for a long period of time, I
overcame because of my supportive
parents, my choice of career (My radio
voice was always being begged for) and
my unit in the church (Bass part which
made the songs beautiful).
When I wasn’t talking of any boyfriend,
date or fiancé yet, it was very natural
when my mum called for a dialogue
with me.

Jean was a single father whose wife had
left him for over five years after he
caught her in an adultery act for more
than three times. I taught his daughter
in her final year and that was how I got
to know him well as he requested for a
private lesson for her at home, during
the holiday.
Whenever I visited the beautiful house
of his, the way he ran around to
prepare food in the kitchen, set the
house in order, pet his daughter to
listen whenever I taught was
overwhelming. He was just too nice!
When he sat me down to say all he had
passed through in his marriage, pity
rose from my belly for him and I
opened my heart to him. I would buy
him gifts, go on picnic with him and
Sarah, his daughter and I would help in
the kitchen- his skills of combining
different ingredients to make
something extra-ordinarily was highly
In fact, when I realized I was in love
with him, I quickly told him about
Jesus and he was truly converted as he
wept for his sin.
When he proposed to me, I was
shocked. I really loved him but never
had I thought about getting married to
a man in his late forties. I told him to
give me some time and I really
calculated the cost.
His daughter loved me
He didn’t divorce his wife- she left him
He is now a Christian
He is good looking, accomplished and
wonderful to be with
What else would I need in a man?
I said a big, fat yes!
It all went well with us as we had
reported at the marriage committee in
the church and our meeting had been
adjourned to next week.
All seemed clear to me until I met
“I am going to teach you a song today. I
told earlier that it’s a special service
today so we are doing everything in
another style. Who knows maybe it’s
for someone her that this service had
been designed?” the pastor said again
and mouth agape, I nodded like an
agama lizard

My pastor is truly anointed!
He started singing thunderously
I will wait, wait, wait on the Lord
I will wait, wait, wait on the Lord
Learn my lessons well
In his timing he would tell me,
What to do,
Where to go
And what to say
The pastor’s voice rung in the whole
building as he sang till the whole hall
felt that move and there was the
outpouring of the spirit. I watched as
people fell to the ground, raised their
hands to heaven in total awe and
surrender to God.
I was too touched to pray!
Suddenly, something struck my heart
and as I held my chest to calm the pain,
a force pushed me down to my knees;
perspiration covered me from head to
toes- I was dripping; I shook as if I had
been suffering from fever for a very
long time, the goose bumps that
covered me and its tingling effects
refused to leave me as I gnashed my
teeth. No words proceeded from my
I moaned and moaned again.
There was a stir in my spirit – for the
first time! I was praying in the spirit.
Prayers that was too superb and extra-
ordinary for my mouth to utter.
‘Many of us say that the Lord can’t
speak to us and that we can’t hear him
because we are not worthy to be
spoken to by the immortal. We prefer
the pastor to hear for us even when
God is talking…He is speaking to you…”
The pastor emphasized on and on and I
suddenly realized the pain in God’s
heart when I limited His ability to talk
to me.
“The wall of partition is broken. Enter
in before him and like Jacob, wrestle
with Him in prayers. He needs who
would dare seek His face. Wait no
more, seek him! He wants to talk to
you. Stop doubting His ability. He is the
Lord God of all flesh. Is there anything
too hard for Him? Is there anything too
hard for God?” the pastor asked with a
stamp of his feet on the floor.
I cried!
My mouth opened and with my mouth
filled with gratitude, I gave Him thanks
for talking through me through the
Then I regrettably said I was sorry for
limiting him. For seeing Him as being
selective of whom he talked to.
“Who says there is no God?” I uttered
affirmatively as if I had a sword to
behead such individual. I stood up
from my kneeling position and joined
in the thanksgiving session that
followed the message session, wiping
my sweat off my face.
The joy in the face of every member
was unspeakable! It was glorious that
my heart kept stirring- the new
spiritual experience that I have got
from God during this service!
Blessed is the woman that married this
Pastor Idile!
Just like a video camera, my eyes
travelled through the church to look
for where Mummy Idile was seated but
I couldn’t sight her. My searching job
begun in earnest.
I saw her briefly that morning clad in a
blue suit gown and a gold hat. Where
could she be?
My eyes travelled to the gallery above
There she was!
There was a smile on her face but the
smile looked somehow.
Sad? Uncertain? Bitter?
I couldn’t figure what was wrong with
that smile but I knew it wasn’t a happy,
grateful smile. I looked on at her and as
she nodded severally, the light above
her shone on her and her face
glistened. I saw it clearly- tears!
What could be wrong with her? Was
God showing her a vision that is very
saddening? What was bothering her Oh
I felt she was supposed to be the
happiest woman on earth for having
such a vibrant man as a husband
especially with this wonderful
outpouring of the Spirit.
My spirit stirred again!
Was God trying to tell me something?
I placed my head on the pew in front
of me. I didn’t even realize that the
service had been brought to an end. I
was overwhelmed within me.
Something is just not right! What is it
oh Lord? Talk to me please!
I didn’t hear anything, I didn’t see
anything. It was just darkness I saw and
I heard the hooting of car horns

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